Demon Worshipping Meme!

[athelind]

Yanked from someone who locked his post so only his friends would know how evil he was...

Are you a demon worshipper? The rather arbitrary list of occult paraphernalia according to the now defunct DemonBusters website. Bold the items you own. Commentary is neat.

1. Occult games (I Ching, ouija boards, tarot cards, crystal ball, fantasy role-playing games such as Dungeons and Dragons) - I have at least three tarot decks, and variations of the last category that would melt the brains of the proprieters of this now-defunct site -- but you know what? I, um, wouldn't touch a Ouija board. I wouldn't even have one in my house. They creep me out, man.
2. Ashes from fire pits, including fireplaces and wood stoves - We have a gas fireplace in this apartment, but we haven't cleaned the charcoal barbecue since July, and there's enough cigarette ash out on the porch to make Mt. St. Helen's feel like a slacker.
3. Robes and detachable hoods - Let's see -- Bathrobe, terrycloth. Matching cotton robes with dragons on them. Two ominous-looking black robes, one with an ornamented shoulder yoke, complete with exotic ritual headwear (from two different college graduations). At least one of my raincoats has a detachable hood -- or maybe it's just one that rolls up into the collar.
4. Gongs, drums and bells - Bells hanging from the front doorknob, more bells hanging from the kitchen door, and more wind chimes than you can shake a stick at.
5. Wooden stand for an altar, a marble slab or crosses -
6. Chalice, goblet, cruet - Cobalt blue, with a dragon on it, and a candle inside! Oooooh!
7. Phallus (sculpture of the male sex organ) - Sometimes a rocket ship is just a rocket ship.
8. Heavy wooden staff, sword, knives - Yes, no, and a kitchen full of'em, duh.
9. Small velvet pillow, scarlet in color
10. Bullwhip, cat o'nine tails, ligatures - Question to my BDSM friends: do bungee cords count as ligatures?
11. Mirror - We've got two rooms that have huge mirrors that take up most of one wall in each. And cabinets with mirrored doors! And... and... there are three mirrors on my car!!!
12. Animal mask, possibly papier mache - Rar!
13. Black satin or velvet glove for the right hand - I have a black neoprene wrist wrap for the right hand. Does that count?
14. Large ruby ring, worn on the first finger of the right hand
15. Flash powder, smoke bombs - Back off, man. I'm a scientist.
16. Incense - Hey, can anyone tell me a good Bay Area supplier for "Dragon's Blood" incense? Our old source stopped carrying it.
17. Body paint, face paint - Nobody in this house even wears makeup.
18. Metal crown with four candle holders - WTF? I agree with Name Withheld By Request; that seems oddly specific, given the broad character of the other items on the list.
19. Ferns, palms - A family of brown thumbs (which is bad, when you're an ecologist).
20. Human or animal bones (especially skull, long bones, finger bones) - I have a chunk of fossilized dinosaur bone, and  a bolo tie with a nicely-polished slice of same.
21. Coffin - Nothing a little Robutussin won't fix.
22. Ritual books, black books, diaries (such as the Book of Shadows, which may be handwritten) - Get with the One-And-Twenty, guys. These days, you keep a LiveJournal of Shadows.
23. Medallions with satanic symbols (such as pentagrams, peace symbol, yin/yang, etc.) - Eyes on pyramids, cryptic Chinese ideograms, badges with "funny" comments....
24. Occult jewelry - "Occult" means "hidden", right? And we've got a whole jewlery box full of stuff we never wear... of course, our wedding rings have dragons on them, and we wear those every day.
25. Small animals in cages - I knew it! Hamsters are Satanic!
26. Graph paper for fantasy games - I'll go you one better: I have hex paper. For hexes, right? Right??
27. Oddly shaped dice - There's nothing "odd" about Platonic Solids. Those d10s have me worried, though...
28. Horror masks and costumes - Sadly, my fursuit is still unfinished.
29. Crystals - Quartz, amethyst, salt, sugar...
30. Small metal figurines of mythological nature -
31. Posters of mythological beings, animals, half-animals - Do I really need to comment on either of these?
32. Nightmarish posters - I think I may still have one for the old Glen Larson Buck Rogers series...
33. Sexual, particularly sado-masochistic, posters
34. Posters of heavy metal and punk rock stars
35. Paraphernalia related to the martial arts - such as ninja costumes and throwing stars

20 out of 35 -- do I win?

Comments

[kynn.livejournal.com]

You beat me!

[jonasbagel.livejournal.com]

I've got 206 human bones, and I use 'em everyday. X)

[paka.livejournal.com]

Next, you're going to tell me about how you masticate frequently.

[drakegrey.livejournal.com]

Oh, you win, you win, all right... a one-way ticket to a Jack Chick/poorly drawn Hell! Ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Yeah, I just kill me.

Seriously - two observations. One, I suck at either geeking or ... er, demon worshpping because I score about a quarter of what you did, on this list.

And two... I just can't really express how oddly arbitrary parts of this list are. Ashes are evil. Ferns are evil. This is so much like everything else I find annoyingly inexplicable in our modern world - it's like, having strong beliefs absolves you of any need for reason, thought or for that matter, good listmaking skills. :P

I want to know more about this DemonBusters site, it sounds hi-larious...

And just for the record, at 20th Century Fox in the executive building's basement, there's a Ouija board. Just sitting there. I'm afraid to ask how often it's used to write scripts, or if it had anything to do with 'Fantastic Four'. :P

--Drake

[athelind.livejournal.com]

Please. Demonic inspiration is still inspiration, and, though I didn't loathe it, the FF movie sadly lacked that.

[drakegrey.livejournal.com]

I suspect the lack of inspiration was either A, that whole deal with the devil thing, you get what you ask for but there's an ironic catch, or B, Fox is so cheap they got a really crappy demon to help them with that. :)

FF was... strangely lackluster. Weird where you consider that they were able to do so much better with the X-Men movies.

So, taking bets as to if Galactus is going to be a big dude in purple armor, in FF2? :)

--Drake

[thoughtsdriftby.livejournal.com]

A bit out there isn't it. That four candle thing isn't a crown, although you could put it on your head it sits on the table (It's a Catholic thing, mine's ceramic). Looking at the list... Yep, they'd burn me. Just having a number of Asian items in the house hits quite a few. Even bowels with five bats (good luck unless the witch burners come). Not into posters.

Let's see, the alter for remembered friends and ancestors isn't up yet and I'm not likely to have the time or space for a coffin, although I do hope to have a number of over-the-top artifacts to bury with me. Sort of a 1000 year plus running joke thing. If there's time to build the coffin I'll want it to be a fair-sized magnetic anomaly.

Funny, never thought small pets were particularly satanic. Ashes...wow you would think human ashes would be right up there. Doesn't list the urn either. Can't afford a ruby yet... Any bonus points for not losing the other glove?

[cpxbrex.livejournal.com]

Man, there used to be a time when having drug paraphernalia would get you labeled demonic! I'm so disappointed.

[rikoshi.livejournal.com]

Back when I was in grade school, I was sleeping over at a friend's house. I was so freaked out by the ouija board that I made my friend put it in another room before I could fall asleep.

[athelind.livejournal.com]

Did you use it, or did it creep you out by its mere presence?

I've never used one of the damned things. Ever since I was a young'un, they've had "NOTHING GOOD WILL COME OF THIS" printed right below "Parker Brothers".

[shdragon.livejournal.com]

I just love how you manage to slide so many every day items in under a technicality.. Knives? Yeah, i use them to cut my steak.. Crystals? Salt and sugar. Mirrors? Just, yeah... And I really like how you described your graduation robes. ;)

I think I just about tie you actually, possibly a little less. The main differences are I lose out on #4 and #12, but I gain #35 for my Katana/Wakizachi set.

And do scented candles count for #16 or not?

[athelind.livejournal.com]

Honestly, other than the Fireplace Ashes, I only bolded an item if I did indeed have something that might be construed as having a ritual purpose -- even if I didn't mention that in my snarky commentary. We really do have quartz and amethyst crystals, robes with dragons on them, a fairly exotic "fantasy" knife (a present from my Baptist father, ironically enough), and a mirror with stained glass ornamentation and shadowbox compartments filled with all manner of little mystical beasties.

My library has a shelf or two of supernatural lore, entirely apart from the two or three shelves of books specifically about dragons...

[wy.livejournal.com]

Oddly, I have 20 of the above categories as well.

[trpeal.livejournal.com]

Re: #20 -- I live in Florida; I have a palm tree in my front yard, and one in my back, as does everyone else. At a minimum. If that's a sign of demon worship, than this whole state of 18 million people is one big coven.

[athelind.livejournal.com]

I come from Southern California.

'Nuff Said.

[halfelf.livejournal.com]

Wow. I have everything you have, and about 5 more.

However, I'm pagan, so I spose that's to be expected. :)

Who the heck would wear a crown with candles though? Isn't that just asking to burn down the house or get hot wax in your eye?