I am with you, in a way, on what you've described as the rote 'playing' of an MMORPG. For the most part, you can effectively go away for a few moments, and wind up still killing things, even if you hadn't meant to. I don't play that way...it disgusts me, even...but still, even with what I feel is the 'old-school', tied-in way of playing, it's nothing like a 'role'. Even on servers that encourage you to roleplay, you're effectively talking over instant messages in a game, and you're not gaining any further 'role' to play.

So, I'm with you on that. Is it still a fantasy/sci-fi game with fun to be had in it? Yes. But sadly, so too is the tabletop stuff I do, and even there I'm the one who usually sticks to a 'role' and doesn't change that to further meta-game my way to greatness. Somehow, I expect, if I could end up in a game with you and your 'group', I'd find that groove I'm looking for, where dialogue does not shift away to pop culture every two minutes, and I'm not left with people who'd rather sit silent for two hours than play the game.